Wednesday, December 2, 2009


Awesome: The holy bro-code.

It’s the Bro-code. I must say I got inspired by Barney from How I Met Your Mother, so let me share the Bro-code with you:

The Bro Code:

Article 1/ The one rule: Bro’s always before hoes.

Honor this rule cause it’s the Holy Grail for every bro.

Article 2: (1) If you’re hitting on a chick which a friend of yours declared interest in as well, at least ask him if he minds. (2) If he’s a real good and close bro to you listen to his opinion and follow it.

Article 3: (1) Never whatever you might desire, feel or think sleep with a woman your bro once married or had a relationship with. (3) Hands off from first grade family as well. (4) If you can’t avoid breaking the rule, you must either marry her or get your Bro laid with a really hot woman to make up for it.

Article4: You can critically judge the girls a bro hooks up with, but never ever interfere in his game. If she used to be a man, an animal or is related to him INTERFERE.

Article 5: (1) Always try to avoid seeing your bro naked. (2)If you can’t avoid it, always keep your eyes above his waist. (3) Never make eye contact.

A possible solution is to fix a point on the wall. Be aware, you WILL look like an idiot staring at the wall.

Situations where this rule usually applies: – Devils Threesome

- Men’s Shower

-When your kidnapped by three huge black men.

Article 6: (1) If you bust your bro’s girlfriend or wife cheating on him, you must give her at least 12 hours to tell him. (2) Then it’s your duty, right and responsibility as a good bro to tell him about it. (3) The time begins with the moment you busted her.

Article 7: (1) If your bro asks you to be his wingman you must be his wingman. (2)The only exception is when you’re scoring points already or you’re about to.

As a wingman it’s your obligation to get him lay with the chick he wants. Distract her friends, lie for him, do whatever is necessary.

Article 8: Never take the last beer, only if you’re granted special permission.

Article 9: (1) If you owe your bro money, pay him back as soon as humanly possible. (2)Gambling debts must be paid immediately.

Article 10: Birthday and Christmas presents for your bros are optional.

Article 11: If you go the bar with your bros, you must buy a round of drinks at least once, but only if you can afford it.

Article 12: (1) Never ever shall you lie to your bros about really important stuff. Important stuff is woman, death, if you’re seriously sick, think about changing your gender, turned gay, broke a bro rule, similar very important stuff. (2)You are allowed to leave these facts out though in a story and must only answer them when you’re questioned.

Article 13: (1) If you get 2 tickets to a big event, the priority list for granting the second ticket is as follows:

1. Your best friends (in order of how long you’ve known them).

2. The family you actually like.
3. Your acquaintances.
4. The chick you really love and you’re not involved with yet.
5. Co-Workers
6. A high class escort.
7. A real Superhero. At least one power needed.
8. Your girlfriend.

Article 14: If two of your bros don’t get along you can ask them to get along, never to get friends or bros.

Article 15: (1) A Bro shall never reveal the score of a sporting event to another Bro until that Bro has thrice confirmed it’s cool. (2) If your bros favorite team lost, don’t push it.


Article 16: (1) Always provide your bro with protection. (2) even if it’s his own fault. (3) Never ever hit your bro, except when he lost a slap-bet.

Article 17: Only your closest friends can count as your bros. A wingman is always a bro.

Article 18: If you violate the one rule your no longer to be considered as a bro. If you break any of the others, a bro’ council must be held with the one bro you hurt as a judge, to decide about your further qualification as a bro.

Further rules are to be continued…