Obituary For The Late Mr. Common Sense

'Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who
 

has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, 
 

since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He
 

will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
 

Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the
 

worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.
 

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more
 

than you can earn) and reliable strategies: adults, not children, are in
 

charge.
 

  
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but
 

overbearing regulations were set in place.  Reports of a 6-year-old boy 
 

charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended
 

from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for
 

reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
 

  
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the
 

job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly
 

children.  It declined even further when schools were required to get
 

parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student;
 

but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted
 

to have an abortion.

 

  
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses;
 

and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
 

  
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a
 

burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
 

  
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to
 

realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot.. She spilled a little in
 

her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
 

  
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his
 

wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.  He
 

is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now,
 

Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.
 

  
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.  If
 

you still remember him, pass this on.  If not, join the majority and do
  

nothing.


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